What if you could break a cycle in 3 steps? I’m showing you how I did this recently when I left my contracted coaching position. In 2019, I became certified as a life coach. One of the things I knew I wanted to do was to build my own private practice–a place where I could serve people who most resonated with me and what I had to offer. So of course, it was only natural that I would begin that process immediately.
Simultaneously, what was of great value to me was creating an unshakeable “knowing” that no matter who showed up for coaching, I could help them. And my belief was that in order to create that kind of confidence, I needed more experience than the program alone had provided. I wanted to deep dive into the work of coaching with as many clients as I could. I found a solution to that. The school that certified me hired me on as a contracted coach. It was my dream job for that moment because I believed that it was an honor to work for them AND I created the unshakeable confidence that I knew I wanted to feel in this work.
I coached hundreds of people.
My self-evaluations became stronger.
The connection and quality of the space I could hold for the clients to process their own growth expanded.
And…I got paid.
All the while, I dabbled in my own business but I didn’t take consistent initiative to grow my program or conduct consults. I justified it because of–my human brain and the thoughts I had believed for a long time. I believed money created a safety net and that I shouldn’t let money go. The money I was seeing coming in wasn’t from my own business. It was from my contract position. I reinforced the importance of that work OVER the priority of the long term success of my private coaching practice because of the my beliefs about money and the safety it created.
I decided that my main priority ultimately was the growth of my own business and contracting served a purpose for a period of time. But as my experience grew and I became confident that the value I could provide to my own clients was abundant, I felt a tug toward leaving my contract work.
Leaving was what aligned with my highest priorities. I already made the decision to start a business from the place in me that doesn’t doubt (I refer to this as my future self.)–she knows it’s possible and inevitable that I can achieve any goal. But the part of me that is built for survival–my primal “wiring”–kept me from leaving by looping me into a cycle that I practiced for years — and I discovered that cycle by doing this coaching work on myself. That cycle is propelled by the belief that “It’s most important to create a safety net.” AND “Money creates safety.”.
As I observed the conflict I was facing, I knew that the procrastination and self sabotage I was demonstrating by not leaving my contracted position was driven by a feeling of fear. ALSO, I know that I create low quality results when my actions are driven (in the long term) by fear. So I got to the bottom of it.
When I got clear, I knew that the only reason this pattern was showing up NOW is because my brain has practiced this cycle for decades. This cycle served me early on. I chose my first career in part because of my desire for safety. I didn’t have a safety net in my 20’s. But I do now. It’s OK to take a risk on myself. I’m willing to bet on myself. There is evidence that I follow through and produce results in other areas of my life. I’m willing to build more trust to take the next step to create the life I say I want to have. Finally…here’s some enlightening news: Money is not what creates safety. I do. And I can trust myself to ensure safety, security and anything else I need. AND YOU CAN TOO.
I’m sharing this because I want you to know that we can all benefit from coaching work. It’s insightful and life changing. We ALL live out patterns we’ve practiced over the years. And it’s OK to stay in the pattern; but if you notice that you keep saying “no” to yourself for something you actually want to have, it’s worth looking at why. Sometimes you find out that your reasons for believing something just aren’t strong enough anymore. When that happens you can find other ways to think about it that allow you to grow into new possibilities.
I didn’t see this pattern right away. It took some time to realize what was going on. It felt uncomfortable. I knew that my conflicted feelings were coming from me but I hadn’t considered that it was from an outdated belief that had once served me. Noticing patterns is part of the coaching process.
I wonder what patterns you’re living out right now that you no longer need to repeat?
The first thing all of my clients experience with me in a 1:1 session is how to create groundbreaking clarity. We find out WHY you are doing the things you do. Next, you decide if you like your rationale for why you’re showing up that way. Finally, there’s the option to make a choice.
Here are the 3 steps to this process:
1: Create Groundbreaking Clarity around WHY you are doing the things you do.
2: Decide if you like your rationale for why you are showing up that way.
Choice A: Keep your belief and with total awareness, continue to do what you’ve been doing and create the results you’ve been creating with acceptance.
Choice B: Decide that there is another way to think about this and while releasing the old belief, craft a new one to change how you show up and what you create.
This SIMPLE process in life coaching allows me to constantly re-align with what’s most important to me. Sometimes I call this living in alignment. Other times I say it’s all about priorities. You might refer to it as balance or some other way.
Our brains spin stories that complicate the data. But I teach a focused process that allows laser precision in knowing yourSELF so you can make decisions and move through life with self trust in a way that isn’t possible when you don’t have clarity.
Do you feel conflicted in your life or business right now? Are you struggling with a decision? You can apply this process. If you want help, hop into my free coaching community and get the support you need.
© 2020 WISE BALANCE LIFESTYLE LLC
*Earnings and income representations made by Krista Kehoe and Wise Balance Lifestyle LLC, and their advertisers/sponsors are aspirational statements only of your earnings potential. These results are not typical and results will vary. The results on this page are OUR results and from years of testing. We can in NO way guarantee you will get similar results.
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